Forgiveness: How Far Would You Go?

Now the tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to hear him. 2 And the Pharisees and the scribes murmured, saying, "This man receives sinners and eats with them." 3 So he told them this parable: 4 "What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness, and go after the one which is lost, until he finds it? 5 And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. 6 And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and his neighbors, saying to them, `Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep which was lost.' 7 Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance. 8 "Or what woman, having ten silver coins, if she loses one coin, does not light a lamp and sweep the house and seek diligently until she finds it? 9 And when she has found it, she calls together her friends and neighbors, saying, `Rejoice with me, for I have found the coin which I had lost.' 10 Just so, I tell you, there is joy before the angels of God over one sinner who repents."  Luke 15: 1-10

How for would I go to forgive someone else? This is the immediate question which popped into my head when I heard this reading yesterday.  In this passage one is encountered by the radical love of the father who forgives his creatures over and over again.  In the gospels there are many teachings that speak specifically of God's boundless love and mercy towards his creatures.  (Read John 10: 1-10, Luke 15: 11-32, Matt. 18: 21-22)  So how far are we willing to go?  Unfortunately the answer for me is: not nearly far enough.

Take for example my daily commute, God forbid someone cuts me off, or drives too slowly, or tailgates me,  I will lash back, often times with great anger. There was one time that I remember explicitly.  Renee and I were driving to Williamsburg, Virginia when on the road someone kept tailgating me for several miles.  As my rude assailant attempted to intimidate me I drove even more slowly to irritate him. Finally when he passed me on the other lane I gave him the one finger salute.  The driver then preceded to stop suddenly and to re tailgate me.  I remember while all of this was going on I wished vehemently that this person rot in hell.   I was so angry I wanted the worst for this guy; he had wronged me and in my eyes he deserved to die.  Luckily for me God does not share my view of forgiveness.  If this was the case I don't think that there would be too many drivers left on the road.

Inevitably when one reads these passages one is confronted with Jesus' radical notion of forgiveness.  Let's face it forgiveness is so counter intuitive, it goes against the self preservation instinct that is so deeply embedded in all of us. The truth is that God will always forgive us if we are sincere in our requests. But there is one big catch; we must show the same forgiveness towards others.  Jesus is very serious about this, take for example the Our Father prayer  there is a part of it which goes, "forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us."  Also in the gospel of Matthew Jesus specifically exhorts one to drop everything and to make peace with the person who has hurt us as he says,

"Leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother and then come and offer your gift."  Matt 5: 24

It is important to realize that forgiveness does not mean that you have to become friends with the person who has wronged you; or that you will magically feel sensations of joy and peace towards your assailant.  Many times forgiveness is just a decision, using only one's will power. Forgiveness is a choice of letting go, of releasing the injury that the person caused us back to God.  Once we do this God will do the rest. Why? because, we can never forgive the way God does on our own.  The great news is that God is willing to go to any lengths to forgive despite our own inability to do so. 

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